Sayonara Solitaire

Downloading and watching the anime Chrno Crusade juz now and can say that it is a good anime. I like the ending song very much though it is in japanese but got translation below. Here's the URL to that song...

http://www.anycities.com/riva/Chrno%20Crusade%20Sayonara%20Solitaire.mp3

This is the translation:

It's because I think I love you
I get hurt, and...
I get confused...
I touch my cold cheek to you, and
My heart was born

I always miss you so much
To the point where I am at a loss of words
I love you
Kindness, how can I see it
Even as I hug you, I more strongly
Believe in your warm chest.
Good-bye Solitarie

Towards tomorrow...

The lyrics nice rite? I really think that the lyrics is nice... The music oso very nice... Another anime song into my collection... ^_^V

Shagged...

Wen QingShan's house last night... Quite a lot of people went but most went home rather early. In the end only got one Year 1 left, Eunice loh, who else... She seem troubled though... We didn't say hi when we saw each other but at least she got answer when I asked her things a few more times... ^_^" Hope time can heal the stabs I gave her... Someitmes juz can't help wondering how's is she getting on nowadays... Last night neber play mahjong so only played some cards with them, played a bit of PS2 as well... Then sit on sofa to rot then gradually dozed off... By the time I woke up, its 6am lidat liao... ^_^"

Going to AMK later to buy a Digital Cam... ^_^V Next time can carry around to take pics liao le... hahaha! omg! Last night the bball court night sky was damn nice but too bad, it lasted only for a short while. When I went with them to go buy food at GV, the clouds are out again else they will have a sightful of it... Tml going to work afternoon shift then monday maybe going Fatty's house...

K Ge Zi Wang...

A few days neber blog liao... CNY's so fast gone liao le... WanYi called me on the 2nd night of new year... Now then I know my fav toolkit is at her house coz that time forget to bring home when I fixing her computer... ^_^" Chatted a while with her before I went to sleep...

ChunKit this few days having some relationship problems but a bit quiet. Not as lame as usual, hope he will be back to usual asap... Today went ktv with ChunKit, Jimmy, Fatty and Newbie they all. Went to the new ktv at clementi... Sang my Chun Zhen again but still cannot figure out 2 words... hahaha... Too chim for me liao le bah... hahaha... Today somehow cannot sing till very high maybe coz I drinking milk tea... ^_^" I think I sing Eason's Shi Nian oso not bad leh... hahaha...

Jimmy and ChunKit always sing those older songs but those songs oso veri nice juz that I neber hear before... Then I sing those recent songs like Jay but Jay's songs all quite hard to sing loh... Think we got time will go K songs again bah... Now I know my voice can go higher than most guys but cannot go low... omg!

AiJia say she coming my house bai nian this fri when they coming Qing Shan's house... Seldom got pple come my house 1 but heng my room always quite neat and tidy... ^_^" This few days keep raining and so cold... Cooling sia but at night sleep a bit cold coz the fan is pointing at me... ^_^"

Signing off for today liao... Take carez gals...

Sabrination?

Die die oso didn't know that Sabrina can write songs and I was classmates with her for 4 years... hahaha! Maybe coz we not in the same clique. Simple webbie but I think the attractive part is the songs. Too bad only got lyrics but no music lidat... Even if got I oso cannot hear it coz I am a music idiot...

Tml going my paternal side then can go home liao but planning to go watch movie with Cyrene and WeiLun they all... Long time neber see this bunch of cousins liao le... ^_^" Finally tidied up my room a bit now look much tidier liao le... Today ponned whole day to slack at home... I got new bed sheets and they are blue! ^_^"

Neber mentioned that we went Kbox on Monday then turbo sing and sing... Sing and sing for 4 hours lidat but my voice can only sing slow songs... Then somemore nowadays mood oso down down lidat so I all sing slow songs... Now then I know my singing not bad leh but I can't recognise some words only... ^_^" Fatty say I see Mayday's Chun Zhen nice sia... hahaha! omg!

Chatted a bit with Eunice juz now but can't seem to sort out anything... Only miracle can save me bah... Haiz... She's bu shuang over my post about the 2-min fone call... Haiz... My online diary of coz write my feelings since she not happy over then suan le loh... I am not going to delete any posts anymore... Haiz... I wonder if time really can heal all wounds... If it's true, how long? I am over sensitive but I think she oso a bit over sensitive bah... But it's natural for gals to be sensitive... I feel that she took my sarcasm too hard liao le... I wasn't in the right mind at that moment... ^_^"

Headache...

Having a slight headache now, maybe caused by my bolster bah... Tidying up my room juz now, removed my bolster's casing then kan a lot of cotton come out... WTH... My nose oso a bit runny liao le... Sianz½... Today ponned most of my lessons then go help Selina with her booth thingy... Chatted here and there with the pple on duty... They are RouHui, JunTing, Rebecca and Sel herself... Then heard from JunTing that her dream car cost 200k++... Win liao loh... Kaoz...

Then went club after duty but no one in there so I went Convention centre there see ZhiCheng and YouWei they all do work loh... Then Eunice came out from nowhere and I become 'glass' again... ^_^" Maybe I juz dont know how to start a conversation with her liao... Argh! Headache getting a bit worse... Stupid cotton... I got sensitive nose...

You guys have a great Chinese New Year bah... Take carez...

I added a new link to my sec sch classmate's Sabrina's webbie... There got some songs written by her... Definitely WanYi's piece of cake... You guys go visit as well loh...

Weekend's here...

Finally the weekend is here... My projects are all underway now so can only get busier and busier... As for Eunice's matter, I think I can only take everyone's advice now, which is 'suan le bah'... Juz let time fade things out... If got fate, we will still be good frens... Past 2 days went home with HuiZhen and laughing most of the time except today coz today a bit tired after my programming practical... Today is day 23 and still now going to be day 24 liao le... Kinda sad that good frens become lidat but can't blame anyone coz it's my fault... The same thing happened with ZhenFu and that screwed up our friendship real bad in sec sch... We were the best of pals but same thing, my childishness and laziness to find out the turth that spolit everything...

I hope life's going back to normal for me... The end of nightmares? Probably not coz I got a stiff neck today coz didn't sleep well the night before... My neck and shoulder is aching like mad when I try to turn right... Haiz... Pain argh...

Day 22

End of Day 21, beginning of Day 22, start of the forth week since she fell out with me... Haiz...

Rather fine day, cool but a bit too cool... Pon my DEUI practical today to go Suntec with my clique... Bought 2 pairs of shoes at $19.90 each... Damn cheap... After that went back to sch at 3pm to meet JingYing but she pang seh me so neber go home with her but we didn't say we going home together or what lah... Juz that I expected that only bah... Went home with ChinSan and XueFeng... Suan her all the way to Sembawang...

Been thinking while walking the pavement home... What mummy said is right bah... Time for me to find out who I like the most liao le... Die die oso muz find the key to unlock my own heart and let those gals out liao le... XiuWei... ShuWen... ShuTing... Helen... Winnie... JunTing... JingYing... Time to let them all out liao... One... Two... Three... FLY!!! Into the cosmos, into the empty space, into the stars except the one who I made mad and angry with me...

Tml having a late day... Starting at 1pm and ending after 5.30pm coz I got project meeting with my project mates... Going into Day 22 and still counting... I wonder if time can really heal wounds of the heart especially that I stabbed her that hard and with such foolishness and childishness... I wanted to say that I did it out of impluse and coz I cared but all are juz excuses and I cannot have any excuses...

Long time since I had a good dreamz, only nightmarez nowadays with her appearing every nite... Each day of her coldness is an extra day of mental torture... WanYi said that Jian Dan Ai is hard to find and almost impossible to find... Maybe she's right...

Tired...

All right... I am tired... Tired of trying to please people... Tired of trying to talk to people... Tired of the fact that I am not getting the slightest of responses... Tired of being treated like glass... Tired of being moody recently... I am juz tired but I can't rest... School work mounting up on me, weekend job to be taken up so that I can continue to pay my bills and have my own life... Haiz...

断了的弦　再怎么练　我的感觉　你已听不见
你的转变　像断掉的线　再怎么接　音都不对
你的改变　我能够分辨...

The Call?

Tried calling Eunice coz long time coz so long neber talk to her liao le but... haiz... less than 3 min put down liao... She asked I call her for what reason... I was like 'huh?'... ^_^" She said call her muz be got reason 1 bah... I answered that I call to talk to her loh... Simple enough answer bah... She said sorry then said no time to talk... Coz she tml got lessons at 8am so she's going to sleep liao le... Haiz... Very interesting conversation indeed... YouWei told me not to call too late and call her handphone and say what he's passing the message only... eh... Maybe I called too late bah... ^_^" I supposed that she know that I am going to call her from YouWei bah... Based on that few minutes, easy to hear that we have drifted miles apart since the incident liao... Don't sound like we got anything to say to each other anymore le... Haiz...

Signing off for tonite... Hope tml will be a better day... ^_^"

The Pavement...

Whenever I go out, I always have to walk the straight pavement home. It's quiet but good for thinking things over, good for mumbling and grumbling as well... Tonite's moon is ancient or appears ancient to me... Nowadays, I enjoy looking at the stars while walking across the CC's bball court more and more... The lights are usually when I came home so the view is simply breath taking...

Went out to watch Paycheck with ShuTing... A bit rush at first coz scare we din manage to get the tickets but in the end got rather good seats... ^_^" Went to eat her fav kway chap at the food court there... Then I went to visit HuiZhen at B.U.M... hahaha! After movie we went walk walk around then bumped into JunTing and RouHui... hahaha! So qiao... hahaha... Didn't send her home coz she meeting her fren to return vcds so avoid the need for explanations... hahaha!

Eunice's back in my channel liao... A good sign perhaps but I think I lost the topics that I can chat with her liao le... 16 days since the incident liao le... We drifted apart a bit... Nvm... Next week go catch up with her can liao le loh... ^_^"

That's all for the day... You guys take carez...

Starry Starry Night

The topic is the name of CSCC's upcoming event but past few nights are really starry starry nights. The moon was approaching full moon, the sky was clear... Very easy to see stars and the feeling was good. ^_^" Had been going on fine if you discounted Eunice. Formatted my computer and ran into some problems to this morning then went up again. hahaha... Yesterday was WanYi's bday! Happy bday Eggie! hahaha... Yesterday went bowling with my classmates... averaged at 120... hahaha! But took a break then come back my hand went soft, cannot even hold the bowls well... hahaha! Too much of something is not good for health bah... hahaha! Finished Westside Story last nite but find the ending a bit lame... hehe...

The day before talked to Andrea about Eunice but seem kinda hopeless liao... ^_^" After that went jogging with Vincent but 3 rounds I KO liao... Good thing is that my shuttle run is still up to standard. ^_^V

Signing off for now... stupid door... neber close properly then wake me up with all the noise... KAOz...

Blue Shopping Spree...

Bought most of my CNY clothes liao... 2 blue jeans, 1 blue sweater, 1 light blue sleeveless, 1 light blue shirt and finally, 1 blue jean jacket... ^_^" All blue! hahaha... Slept with a heavy heart last night but din know till last night that Helen really know me... Her description of me is typical me... hahaha... Occasional mood swings... Treat people veri well especially gers but turn into a devil when the mood swings strikes... Like a werewolf? hahaha... Don't know lah... Lost a good fren and unearthed another... That's life bah... Full of xi nu ai le...

Dreamz on...

Is it possible to turn back?

遇见你 需要运气 爱上你 却要多少勇气
渺小的我只忠于自己 人世间却容不下一段传奇

有人说该忘了你 我宁愿忘记了我无知
失去了你讨好整个天地有什么值得了不起
我不顾一切让世界停止 也要换你一个坚持人生的结局
不相聚就是分离 也总算留下了相爱的痕迹

有人说我该放弃 要反悔比执迷还容易
最难的是失去爱的能力 在孤独里醉生梦死
全世界都在等着我看着你 让我吻下去爱上你

Moved On...

Kinda solved the problem with Eunice. Feel that she's still a bit mad at me. We have moved on, friends but perhaps not as good as we used to be anymore... Juz another case of YongCong... Another case of my childishness, my jealousy, my rashness, my outburst... Another friendship that sunk by my own fury, fire and flames... Close as secret keepers but now drifted apart like birds leaving their nest, flying in different direction. Hope her yang guang dao will be smooth, easy and filled with joy... Maybe our roads will cross again but for now, it's forking out for now... I doubt I will see her smile and hear her laughter anymore... At least not when I am around bah...

Juz put down the fone with Helen... Long time since she called but she called to ask about hamsters only lah thenask me why I sounded like want to cry lidat... Haiz... Told her a bit but still... Haiz... Some things change and going back to be like the past is not possible...

I plunged a sword into her and twisted it before pulling what... The damage is done, the scar is left... I regretted it but there can be no turning back...

Life Sux...

Sometimes people wondered where I get the kind of tolerance to take extreme cases of insult. I think I now can answer it... From home... Yep, from home... Where else can I find extreme cases of insult other than from the mouths of my parents. All the beautiful 'idioms' not even found in dictionaries... Threw out a cupboard of old books that I quite liked juz now. My phone line extension got ripped off my mother. Maybe next time I juz have to use my handphone for chatting. Been a rather fucked up month, Eunice got mad at me for my childishness and my mother's usual blasting sessions putting me on the edge with pended up stress. Off day oso have to kena ordered here and there. Oh yah, I forgot... I am supposed to be a tireless robot always ready to do things. No wonder I pissed off Eunice. Sometimes I juz find that no matter how tidy my room is, I still get the dumb blasting for not tidying up my room. Come on lah, it's my room, you are not the one sleeping in it. MY grandma said that I am veri tidy but seems like my mother's sense of tidiness differs from normal people. I think maybe it's time for me to plan about moving out instead. My uncle asked me if I got think of going to university anot and my answer is yes, who doesn't? But it is no longer an option for me, I don't have the big bucks to send myself through 3 years of university.

I am not a rich fellow born with a silver spoon in his mouth. I am not even a normal kid born with a normal spoon in his mouth. I have to make my own spoon... At least I worked enough during school days to make my phone bills and net bills meet. But my aunt popped my with this question that caught me: Your sis oso using internet then why you are the one paying everything? I was like 'No choice mah. Life's lidat...' ^_^"

I normally don't get angry in school and at my friends for their suaning. Come one lah, my sec sch friends call me a dog and I am quite okay with it. They always go: Hey Jiehao! Want to go eat Pedigree anot? I don't get angry not coz I want to por them or wat but coz they are my friends. But I did got lit up a few times over that 'dog' matter, I am irritated by that after sometimes bah.

I juz hope that I grow up faster so I won't be having childish thinking, definitely not those that caused Eunice to be mad at me... Haiz... Maybe now I know why I always try to go outside when I am having off days liao... I juz don't want to stay at home and kena kp... My room is my Heaven but my house is Hell... I am not pissed off over ZhiHao's remark liao le... Remembering so many unhappy things for wat? I rather use that space for happier moments...

Time to go nap a while liao but I know that I sure kena kp for not doing that or doing this later. Used to blasting already... It felt bitter in my throat coz I am a bit of a mummy's boy. I don't ding zhui but once I exploded, I am ready to go die... Haiz...

Life sux... That's why we have dreamz...